Life After Adoption

While things haven't changed much after the adoption, there has been some thought provoking changes that have occurred. It took a bit for Selena to settle in to the thought that there were indeed more changes then just the change of her last name. I believe it was a good week before she actually announced that she was not our granddaughter anymore but our daughter. She still calls us Mama and Papa and on occasion Grandma and Grandpa, but on rare times she does run in and call us Mom and Dad. It doesn't matter to us, since this truly has been a norm for us, for her to call us by these names anyway. Selena was pretty excited though as the mail rolled in with things that had her last name on it, we still wait for the new birth certificate, then we can go get her new Social Security Card, but all the medical, insurances, and other forms of documentation now show her real name.

I believe I myself have had the hardest time with the newness of this. I realized this yesterday when we took Selena in for her eye exam, as I filled out the paperwork, I realized WOW I can now write her name out the same as ours. I have to stop myself many times when we are out and realize I am still referring to myself as Grandma, but then stating that she is our daughter, I bet people are a wee bit confused. I also loved when I was pricing to have her birthstone added to my Mom's ring, that I had to explain to the clerk, the exact reason I wanted this stone added, "No, I am not looking for a Grandmother's ring! Yes, she is mine!" As I stood there patting her on top of the head.

Life itself has not changed, we are still the same family we do the same things, share the same likes and dislikes just as before, but deep inside all of us there is just a sense of completeness, a sense of joy, and a sense of security.

Selena wanted a huge adoption party, she ran around and invited everyone within the community, friends and strangers alike. We did have a church potluck, to celebrate the adoptions that have taken place in our church family, complete with a beautifully decorated cake. It was fun to celebrate our wonderful day with another beautiful family who adopted a child from China. Two families made complete, two children who's dreams have been made a reality.

Our friends gave us a special night date, and kept Selena for us. It was fun to go out with my husband and talk about everything but home life. Selena had so much fun staying with them for the evening. She enjoyed helping in the kitchen and enjoyed having Kelly show her how to set a formal table, now keep in mind there are only the three of us, but she was setting the table for 7 that evening.

Papa and I enjoyed a wonderful dinner at The Terrace Falls in Olympia Washington. Then enjoyed a great visit with our friends after.

While in many ways adoption has not changed a lot about the dynamics of our little family, it has changed all of us, it has touched all of us in a very special way.